Kairi Loves her Pudding!
by jbhyperandweird
Summary: What language will Muzzy speak next? Is Tidus really part squirrel? IS KAIRI IN LOVE WITH PUDDING?
1. The Randomness Begins!

A/N: This is really not gonna make any sense o.0 but...THATS MEEEE!!!!!!   
  
Disclaimer: no....Kingdom Hearts is NOT mine....*takes it* NOW IT IS!!!   
  
Lawyers: GET HER!!!!  
  
Kiki: o.0 *runs away from lawyers into endless abyss*   
  
random echo that comes from nowhere (RETCFN....o.0): I like peacocks! Peacocks! Peacocks! Peacocks! *fades away*  
  
Kairi: *sings* Ohhhhh!!! How I love PUUUUUDDDDIIIIINNNNGGGGG!!!!!! *swings around butterfly net* PUDD--OOF! heeeeeeeey!!!! *tripped over Sora's head*   
  
Sora: OW!!! THATS THE 239,456,398,453,984TH TIME!!  
  
Kairi: o.0 Why is your head down there? *pokes it with stick* and wheres your body?! EEEE!!!! IT DISSAPEARED JUST LIKE WAKKA!!!!  
  
Wakka: o.0 like, I'm right here, ya...  
  
Sora: OW! STOP POKING!!!...and...Riku buried me in the sand ;-;  
  
Riku: *maniacle laugh* MUHAHAHAHA--*chokes on random mice that starts to rain from the sky* *coughs them up* HAAA!! I RULE!!!   
  
mob of pink dressed fan girls: OOOOOOOHHHHHH RIKU!!!! YOU DOOOOO *falls over fainted*  
  
number 398 pink dressed fan girl: POSE FOR US RIKU!!!!!  
  
Riku: SURE!!!! *starts posing*   
  
camera man dude thing: OH YAH! COME ON! GIVE IT TO ME!! THATS IT! YAH!  
  
Kairi: ;-; why doesn't anyone want me to pose for them?  
  
Sora: *still dug in ground* o.0;; cause...your heads too big...  
  
Kairi: oh...OK! TRALALALALALALA!! *skips away, but trips over fly* OUCH! *head lands on coconut, making her fall unconscious*  
  
mob of pink dressed fan girls: YAAAAAAAAAAYYYYY!!!!!!!!! *hold up #1 foam fingers and flags that say Riku*  
  
Riku: *happy sob* I'M SOOOOOO LOVED!!!  
  
Sora: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! ST-STOP TICKLING!! AHAHAHAHAHA!!!   
  
Worm from underneath ground: HEHEH! NO! *continues to tickle Sora*  
  
Ansem: *runs in on llama* MUHAHAHAHA!!! DARKNESS SHALL RAIN OVER ALL!!!!!!  
  
Tidus: *jumps out of Wakka's ear* Don't you mean 'reign'?  
  
Ansem: NO! MUHAHAHAHA!!!!  
  
*suddenly, pink fluffly bunnies begin to rain from sky*   
  
Riku *really good voice*: I'M SIIIIIIIIIIIINGING IN THE--OW! *bunnies start to fall on his head* OW! OUCH! HEY! NUUU!!! DARKNESS REALLY IS RAINING OVER ALL!!!! *falls unconscious*  
  
Selphie: *comes out of random paupo that was dropped by Sora* AWWWWW!!! LOOK AT THE CUTE LITTLE BUNNIES!!! *starts to collect them along with a few moogles that also rain from sky*  
  
Ansem: o.0 She is...EVEN MORE EVIL THAN ME!!! NO ONE CAN WITHSTAND THE EVIL BUNNIES!! NOT EVEN MEEEEE!!! ._. wait a minute....*bunnies and moogles rain on him* AHHHHH!!!! I'M MELTING!!! I'M MELTING!!!! *sinks in water*  
  
Cloud: I knew we shouldn't have given him that milk...  
  
Dorothy flies in hot air balloon: I'm not in Kansas anymore!!!   
  
All: 0.0 who are you?  
  
Dorothy: *suddenly turns into Glenda, and flies away in bubble* why, I'M GLENDA, THE GOOD WITCH!!!  
  
All: 0.0;;  
  
football players: *grunt snort* WHERE ARE THE DANG CHEERLEADERS?!   
  
*suddenly, all girls from FFX appear, with Rikku in front of the rest*  
  
Rikku: READY? LETS GO!   
  
*all start kicking*  
  
Yuna: OWWWW!!! MY BACK!!!!  
  
Seymour: o.0  
  
Sora: 0.0 WHO ARE ALL YOU PEOPLE?! *head starts to moves around, trying to get out of hole*  
  
Mareg (from Grandia 2): WEEEEEEE ARE ALIEENNNNNNSSSSSSS!!!!!!   
  
Tio (also from Grandia 2): MAREG! YOUR DEAD, REMEMBER?!  
  
Mareg: umm.....no? *innocent smile*  
  
Rikku from FFX: AHHHHHHHH!!! HE'S BARING HIS TEETH!!!! RUN AWAYYYYY!!!!!!! *all FFX girls run away, screaming like little girls*  
  
Mareg: o.0  
  
Tio: YOU'RE COMING WITH ME!!!!!!! ITS OFF TO THE CHAIR WITH YOU, SONNY! *drags him by his teddy bear like ears*  
  
Mareg: NOT THE CHAIR!! NUUUUU!!!  
  
  
  
Tio: *slams him in high chair that snaps and falls down when he sits in it*  
  
Mareg: ;-; ouch...*pulls wooden leg from butt*  
  
All: 0.0  
  
Riku: *suddenly not unconscious* who ARE all these people?!  
  
Worm: ^_^ there all my children!  
  
Sora: o.0 there a soap opera?!  
  
Oprah: *suddenly pops in inside a tub full of bubble bath* I'm not soapy!  
  
Sora: I said soap opera...  
  
Baha Men: is that like a soap box derby, brudda?!  
  
Wakka: They stole my accent! ;-;  
  
Tidus: nuh uh, you stole theirs! *suddenly runs off like a squirrel* *is twitchy like* o.0 *nibbles off acorn*  
  
Random Echo: o.0 Lets watch Muzzy! Muzzy! Muzzy! Muzzy! *fades away again*  
  
Kairi: Si! ^_^  
  
Sora: MUZZY! HOLA MUZZY!!!  
  
Riku: MUZZY EL GRANDE!!!  
  
Muzzy: *points to Riku* El es hott...  
  
Riku: o.0   
  
Sora: o.0  
  
Selphie: o.0  
  
Wakka: o.0  
  
Ansem: o.0  
  
Kairi: PUDDING!  
  
Camera Man dude thing: o.0  
  
football players: o.0  
  
Rikku and all the other FFX girls that supposidly ran off: o.0  
  
Oprah: o.0  
  
Kiki: o.0  
  
Mareg: ;-; oh wait.... o.0  
  
Tio: o.0  
  
Random Echo that now has a nonexistent face: o.0  
  
Tidus: *nibble nibble* *shifty eyes*  
  
mob of pink dressed fan girls: *nod nod* Si el es!  
  
Muzzy: *runs up to Riku and starts to hug him*   
  
Riku: HES...LIKE...POOH...  
  
Sora: HEY! GUESS WHAT!!!   
  
Kairi: *covers nose* AW SORA, YOU DIDN'T!!!  
  
Ansem: oh...sorry *blushes* excuse me...*innocent smile*  
  
All: EWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!! *covers noses*  
  
Sora: 0.0;; no...thats not it...I HAVE A JOKE ABOUT WINNIE THE POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!!!  
  
All: -_-;; ok...lets hear it..  
  
Yuffie: *comes out of pom pom ontop of a moogles head* Yah, lets hear it!  
  
Sora: *chuckle giggle* Why was Tigger looking in the Toilet?  
  
All: *sigh* why?  
  
Yuffie: *excited* YAH, WHY?!  
  
Sora: *snicker* cause...heheh...HE WAS LOOKING FOR POOH!!!! *suddenly cracks up laughing*  
  
All: x.x now that was uncalled for...  
  
Cone-head family: yah...  
  
Riku: o.0 where did you come from...?  
  
Cone-head family: THE DARN MUNCHKINS LED US HEAR!!!  
  
Munchkins: *evil snicker* FOLLOW THE YELLOW BRICK ROAD!!! *runs along yellow brick road that goes across the ocean*  
  
Kiki: *glare* I always knew they were evil...  
  
  
  
wow...that really DIDN'T make any sense...OH WELL!!! 


	2. Lowfat Pancakes!

A/N: Yet another freaky chapter that has nothing to do with anything inparticular. o.0 but...uh....  
  
Ansem: DARKNESS SHALL REIGN OVER ALLLLLLLL!!!  
  
Kiki: ....o.0 yah...ok...I'll go with him...*drags Riku along and follows Ansem*  
  
Disclaimer: noooo...I don't own Kingdom Hearts...  
  
Kiki: *puts him down on the floor* GET KINGDOM HEARTS FOR ME!!!  
  
Riku: uhh....no...?  
  
Kiki:...darn...why can't you be like my dog??????? X.O  
  
Riku:...you don't have a dog... o.0  
  
Kiki: *thinks* oh yah o.o;;;  
  
Riku: o.0;; *inches away slowly*  
  
And so the randomishnessthingamabobberjigger continues!!!  
  
Chapter--Somehow the whole cast, and a few extras, came to Kiki's(*cough* ME *cough cough* house o.0 and it is breakfast time...  
  
Sora: *reading Newspaper while eating Ostrich eggs*  
  
Riku: *eating low fat pancakes...are there such things...? o.0* mmm!!!! this is great!  
  
Sora: YAH! I KNOW! JCPENNIES IS HAVE A SALE ON PANTIES!!!   
  
Everyone: 0.0 *food drops off utensils like in the cartoons*  
  
Kairi: OO! OO! I WANNA WATCH CARTOONS!!!  
  
Kiki: no! not until you've taken your vitaball!  
  
Kairi: aw....darnit...  
  
Kiki: *hands her gumball vitamin thingy*  
  
Ansem: ooo!! ooo!!! I want my vitaball!!!  
  
Li(friend of Kiki): *suddenly rams through the wall and hits Ansem with ze proppled meese* YOU STOLE MEH LLAMAS!! NOW YOU MUST PAY!!!  
  
Ansem: *sob* but the random echo stole my lunch money!!! ;-;  
  
Random echo: *innocent whistle. whistle. whistle. whistle.--  
  
Kiki: THATS ENOUGH ECHOING!!!  
  
Random echo: echoing! echoing! echoing! *fades away again*  
  
Kiki: o.0 *just realizes the whole KH cast and a few extras are in her kitchen* MY MOM'LL KILL ME!  
  
Selphie: EEEE!!!! SORA! WHY DID YOU TOUCH MY LEG?!   
  
*SLAP*  
  
Kairi: *GASP*  
  
*SLAP*  
  
Tidus: *nibble nibble on cereal*  
  
Worm: *blush* sorry, that was me...  
  
Selphie: o.0....o...k....  
  
Worm: WILL YOU BE MY VALENTINE?!  
  
Riku: EW! I WILL NOT! THATS JUST WRONG!!!  
  
Everyone: 0.0  
  
Worm:...ehhhh...I was talking to Kairi...  
  
Selphie: *sob* but you touched my leg!!!!  
  
random echo: HE WAS LYING! I DID IT! DID IT! DID IT! DID IT! DID IT!  
  
Lawyers: DO YOU GUYS WANNA SETTLE THIS IN COURT?!  
  
Everyone: *silence*  
  
Lawyers: THATS WHAT I THOUGHT! We'll be leaving now...*court music starts to play*  
  
Lawyer #1: *whispers* shhh!!! turn of the tape player!   
  
Lawyer #2: oops! sorry! *slaps briefcase of table, opens, takes out tape player, and turns it off* *music suddenly stops playing* NOW we'll be leaving...*ahem* yah...  
  
Lawyers: *suddenly run through the oven*  
  
Everyone: 0.0;;  
  
Wakka: *just notices what Sora is eating* *GASP* I'M AN OSTRICH RIGHTS ACTIVIST!!!!  
  
Sora: ...o.0 did I mention JCpennies is having a sale on panties...? *nervous chuckle*  
  
Wakka: *tackles Sora*  
  
Riku: EW! YOU GUYS, IF YOUR GONNA DO THAT, TAKE IT OUTSIDE!!!  
  
Tigger: EWWWW!!! RIKU!!!  
  
Yuffie: *drinks from kitty bowl* Meow...?  
  
Everyone: 0.0  
  
Sora and Wakka: *squish worm that was unfortunatly in the way of them rolling on the ground*  
  
Kiki: *GASP* I'M A WORM RIGHTS ACTIVIST AND I'M TOTALLY INSULTED!!!!  
  
Everyone: 0.0  
  
Sora and Wakka: 0.0;; *nervous laugh*  
  
Kiki: *tackles them both*  
  
Cloud: *comes from the endless abyss* *slaps forehead* ai ai ai...  
  
Kiki: hey, thats my line!  
  
Selphie: o.0...? *suddenly turns into a Paupo*  
  
Selphie: YAY! MY DREAMS HAVE COME TRUE!!!  
  
Riku: ...you always wanted to be a paupo...?  
  
Selphie:...well, no...I just don't have to deal with that darn weggie since I don't have to wear clothes!  
  
Everyone: 0.0 *shudders at image of Selphie not wearing clothes*  
  
Meh: wait a minute...how can she talk if shes a paupo...?  
  
Sora: *shrugs*  
  
Wakka: *shrugs*  
  
Riku: *shrugs*  
  
Lawyers: *shrugs* (wait...I thought they left? Kiki: *shrugs* o.0)  
  
Football players: *comes out of the TV and shrugs*  
  
Cheerleaders/FFX girls that supposudly ran away at Mareg baring his teeth: *steps through random closed window* *shrugs*  
  
Tigger: *shrugs*  
  
Kairi: *shrugs*  
  
Tidus: *nibble nibble* SQUEEEEAAAAAAAL!!!....*twitchity twitch* *nibble nibble*  
  
Munchkins: *evil cackle*  
  
Squall: 0.0 how did I get here? *shrugs* *walks away*  
  
Kiki: 0.0  
  
Yuffie: *hiss growl* meeeeeeeeeeooooooooowwwww!!!!!!! hiss hiss!!  
  
Ansem: *looks around at chaos* o.0;; now is the time to release my evil plan...I will soon take over the world, with my...*holds up his underwear* oh wait...that not it...*blushes and zips up his pants*...AHA! *holds up lip gloss container* muhahahahaha...*slips away into Kiki's room*  
  
Everyone: *not notice that Ansem left cuz they don't care*  
  
Riku: EEE!!! WHAT WAS THAT?!  
  
Kairi: ...was it...PUDDING?!  
  
Everyone: 0.0   
  
Riku: noooo....something pulled my hair, and then I heard a snipping sound...  
  
Sora: *innocent whistle* lalala..I didn't cut Riku's hair...*holds scissors behind back*  
  
Riku: *looks in mirror that was convinietly placed beside him* EEEEEE!!!! MY HAIR! MY PERFECT LITTLE HAIR!!!!  
  
Everyone: 0.0  
  
Riku: DIE, BANANA SHOES!!! *tackles Sora*  
  
Kiki: WAIT! STOP EVERYTHING!!!!!   
  
Everyone: *freezes* *unfortunately, Yuffie was going to the bathroom in the litter box again when the Kiki yelled this*  
  
Kiki: ...don't fight when someone has scissors in their hand!  
  
Wakka: *sobs* too late ;-; *has scissors in his ear*   
  
Everyone: 0.0  
  
Kairi: ^_^;; woops, sorry, I put them there! Eheheh  
  
Everyone: x.x;;  
  
Kiki: o..k...anyways...you may now begin the fight...  
  
Riku and Sora: *punch kick POW!*  
  
Kiki: GO RIKU!!! W00T! WHOOP THAT BALLOON PANTS' *bleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep*  
  
News reporter: *has cereal spoon up to mouth and using it like microphone* in other news, this horrible fight started this morning. Nobody knows who will win, but first, lets talk to a witness. So, what do you have to say about this, Vodka?  
  
Everyone: 0.0  
  
Wakka: x.x its Wakka...and...*starts to sob hysterically* I SAW IT WITH MY OWN EYES AND EARS!!! *points to scissors still sticking out of ears*  
  
News reporter: 0.0 o..k...now to Theodoric Rumpelstiltskin for the weather...  
  
Camera man: *suddenly starts to film Riku and the fight*  
  
Riku: o.0 we're being filmed...? *stops fighting, gets up, and starts posing* For all you fan girls out there, I'm single..*wink wink*  
  
Sora: *waves at camera* HI MOM!!!!  
  
Sora's mom: o.0 ehhh..hunny, I'm right behind you...  
  
Sora: *turns around* AHHHHHH!!! SOMEONE CLONED MEH MOMMY!!!!! nuuuuuuuuu!!!!! *runs*  
  
Kiki's mom: *from up in the shower* HUNNY?! WHAT IS GOING ON DOWN THERE?!  
  
Kiki: o.0;; uhh....*nervous look* nothing mom!!!   
  
Random echo: nothing mom! nothing mom! nothing mom!  
  
Meh: EEEE!!! SHES GONNA FIGURE OUT THAT THE WHOLE CAST FROM KH ARE HEEEEEEERE!!!  
  
Yuffie: *nuzzle nuzzle against Tidus' leg and starts to purr*   
  
Everyone: 0.0  
  
Tidus: *twitch twitch*   
  
Narrator: So many questions! Will Kiki's mom find out about the whole cast of KH is eating breakfast in the kitchen? Will Tidus and Yuffie become a couple? WHATEVER HAPPENED TO THE PUDDING KAIRI WAS TALKING ABOUT?! Tune in next time to--  
  
Kiki: uhh...you forgot something...  
  
Narrator: ...I did?  
  
Kiki: yah, you forgot the one thing...  
  
Narrator: what did I forget?  
  
Kiki: you forgot: *suddenly has the same Narrator voice* WHAT IS THE EVIL PLAN THAT ANSEM HAS IN MIND?! ......yah....  
  
Narrator: o..k...*pulls script out of Wakkas ear* oh...whoopsies! ^_^;; anyways, TUNE IN NEXT TIME TO FIND OUT!!!  
  
Wakka: ;-; ...how come everything is in my ears...?  
  
Kiki: shutup Wakka! The chapters over!   
  
*Curtain closes*  
  
random voice that sounds like Kiki from behind the curtain: ..hey...when did we get a curtain...? o.0;; 


	3. THOSE DARN CURTAINS!

A/N: the last chapter really sucked .;; but...THE SHOW MUST GO ON!!!! *stomps through curtains*   
  
Everyone: o.0;;  
  
Kiki: AHHH!!! *gets tangled up by the evil curtains* *sob sob*  
  
Everyone: THOSE DARN CURTAINS!   
  
Curtains: *innocent whistle* but we're little angels!  
  
Everyone: *glare, and looks at them*  
  
Curtains: *suddenly, little angel design appears on them*  
  
Everyone: 0.0  
  
Kiki: WAAAAA!!! NOW I GOTS A BOO BOO!!!! *holds up finger* WAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!   
  
*suddenly football players ram through the curtains grunting*  
  
random football player: o.0 this isn't the football field...  
  
Cloud: *comes out of random waffle* o.0 ai ai ai...*slaps forehead again*  
  
Kiki: WAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! *suddenly stops*.....*sniff sniff*...do you smell that....? It smells like....*sniff* THE DISCLAIMER!!!!!   
  
Disclaimer: MUHAHAHAHAHA!!! *cough hack sneeze choke die* x.x  
  
Kiki: o.0 ok...from now on, I'm the disclaimer....  
  
Disclaimer: I do--  
  
Kairi: *GASP* I THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD, DISCLAIMER!!!!!  
  
Riku: *trying to shove Disclaimers non-existent body into arcade machine* 0.0 it's not dead? *looks at obviously dead disclaimer*  
  
Kiki: x.x NO! I SAID, FROM NOW ON, I'M THE DISCLAIMER!  
  
Kairi: but, if you're the disclaimer...then you have to be dead!  
  
Kiki: X.X;;;;;;;; ~I'm getting tired of this....~ Kairi! look over there! PUDDING!!!  
  
Kairi: *GASP* PUDDING?! WHERE?!   
  
Kiki: *points to random spot away from where she was standing* THERE! GO GET IT BEFORE IT HIDES IN WAKKA'S EARS!!!  
  
Wakka: 0.0 *covers ears*  
  
Kairi: *runs off like a dog, and a few others follow including Yuffie, Tidus, and the evil muchkins*  
  
Kiki: there...ANYHOO! I do not own Kingdom Hearts...*shake head* *sigh* glarg...I wish I did...  
  
Worm that was supposed to be squished in recent chapter: *holds up present* I GOT IT FOR YOU!  
  
Kiki: *big teary eyes* thank you so much worm! I lov--*looks inside poorly wrapped box, and sees the game inside* x.x I have the game...stoopid worm....*looks up to see big rain cloud above her* ;-;  
  
Wakka: ...how could he wrap a present if he don't have any hands, yah?  
  
Kiki: 0.0 I don't know....  
  
Worm: WILL YOU BE MY VALENTINE?!  
  
Kiki: 0.0 uhh....how do I say this...  
  
Worm: *cough* I was talking to Riku...  
  
Everyone: 0.0  
  
Riku: o.0 *inches away out of sight*  
  
Kiki: .... ._.;; onto the story....  
  
Chapter--the cast and a few extras are still somehow at Kiki's house, but now its in the afternoon, and they're all doing random things of stuffishness.....and, no, Kiki's mom still didn't find out...x.x;;  
  
Riku: ahh..all this fan mail to look through! *swims in piles of fan mail*  
  
Kairi: *is watching TV* *sobs* I LOVE IT WHEN DOROTHY GOES BACK HOME!!! *blow nose in random tissue that the random echo gave her and hands it to the pudding sitting beside her*  
  
evil munchkins: 0.0;; *suddenly gets interested and plant themselves infront of the TV*   
  
random munchkin number 23: how can Dorothy go back home if we're not there to help her follow the yellow brick road...?  
  
all other munchkins: SHHHHH!!! *goes back to watching*  
  
random munchkin number 23: *sob* I MUST KNOW!!!!!  
  
Kiki: o.0 o...k...  
  
Worm: TRALALALALA--*is somehow swinging around butterfly net, but suddenly tripped over Muzzy's head* OOF! ouch...heeeeeey...Muzzy, what yah doing down there? and...where's your body?! OH NO! IT DISSAPEARED JUST LIKE KIKI!!!!!  
  
Kiki: o.0;; uhh...I'm like right here yah...*suddenly has Wakkas accent* 0.0  
  
Sora:...o.0 this somehow seems slightly familiar...*twitches as he remembers all the trippings over his head* -.0  
  
Muzzy: *sob* the Disclaimer burried me...  
  
Everyone: *GASP* BUT I THOUGHT THE DISCLAIMER WAS DEAD!!!!!!   
  
evil munchkins: SHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!  
  
Kiki: o.0;; how the heck could a dead person bury someone into my carpet...?   
  
Dorothy on TV: *keeps running around and around on Yellow brick road that just goes in spirals*  
  
In the bathroom....  
  
Wakka: *has q-tip in ear* I gotta make sure nothing else is in mah ear, brudda.......why am I talking to myself...? o.0 *continues cleaning out ear*  
  
Kiki's mom: *suddenly walks into the bathroom* AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!  
  
Wakka: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!  
  
Tigger: *pops out of the shower with a towel around his waist and a shower cap* AHHHHHH!!!!  
  
Kiki: *downstairs* WHAT WAS THAT?! DID YOU HEAR SOMETHING?!  
  
FFX girls: noooooooooope...  
  
upstairs again....  
  
Wakka: *q-tip flies from hands and pops out of his ear* *a kitty comes with it* 0.0 thats where mew-mew was hiding....*picks up kitty and hugglez it* I LOVE YOU MEW-MEW!  
  
random guy holds up sign to readers that says: say AWWWWWWWW!!!!  
  
Readers: Awwwwwww....  
  
Kiki's mom: 0.0 who are you two?!  
  
Tigger: uhh...we're Kiki's playmates! *bubbles on him go POP!*  
  
Wakka: *nervous nod*  
  
Kiki's mom: oh, well, ok! just make sure that kitty doesn't go on the carpet!  
  
Wakka: ...what carpet...?  
  
Kiki's mom: DON'T TALK BACK TO ME YOUNG MAN! *cough* that one...*suddenly points to tiger rug*  
  
Tigger: 0.0 *springs into the sink drain* *unfortunately, IT was hiding in there to, and he gobbled up Tigger*  
  
Kiki: *still downstairs* are you sure you didn't hear anything...?  
  
evil munchkins: SHHHHHHH!!!!!!  
  
football players: I hate this channel...*picks up remote and turns it to the discovery channel*  
  
TV: and here, we will insert a mi-cro-scop-ic camera, so that you can actually SEE the sperm fertilize the egg...  
  
evil munchkins: AHHHHHHHHHH!!!! *runs away crying 'THE BRITISH ARE COMING! THE BRITISH ARE COMING!'*  
  
Kiki: AHHH!!! IT BURNS THE EYES!!!!!!  
  
random football player number 34: AHHH!!! CHANGE IT! QUICK!!!  
  
Yuffie: *barfs up meow-mix*   
  
Everyone: EWWWWW!!!!  
  
football players: GIVE...IT TO...MEEEE!!! *fighting over the remote* *suddenly drops it*  
  
Kiki: 0.0 *batteries fall out* NUUUUUUUUU!!!!!! *sobs*  
  
football players: *try to put them back in* NO! NO! IT GOES THAT WAY!  
  
Kiki: *covering eyes* just get them in, quick!!!!  
  
*suddenly, Ansem jumps from down the stairs, wearing a pink spongebob T-shirt, and some baby blue flares*  
  
Kiki: *turns around so that she can opens eyes* *opens them* AHHHHH!!! *sees Ansem infront of her* ...hey...IS THAT MY MOMS BRA YOU STUFFED?!  
  
Ansem: *high voice* uhh...no...AND I DIDN'T STUFF A BRA ;P THESE ARE REAL!   
  
Kiki: x.x oh gawd...first the horrors of reproduction, and now this...  
  
Ansem: *looks behind Kiki* OOOOoooo!!!! my favourite channel!  
  
Everyone: *barfs*  
  
Ansem: *plops down on couch and watches*  
  
Everyone: CHANGE...IT!!!! *is about to die*  
  
Yuna: *changes it to wrestling* there...  
  
football players: YAHHH!!! GO YUNAAAA!!!! *tackles her...o.0*  
  
Sora: *looks over to Ansem* *whistle* who's the hott babe in the spongebob tee?  
  
Everyone but Sora and Ansem: 0.0  
  
Ansem: *still high voice* I am...uh...Mesna! o.0  
  
Kiki: 0.0 isn't that just Ansem spelled backwards...?  
  
Muzzy: SHHH!!!  
  
Kiki: o.0;;  
  
Sora: Well, yah wanna go get some stir fry? I got munny! *leans towards Kiki* psst, can I borrow a twenty...?  
  
Kiki: 0.0 noooooooooo...*slaps forehead* you idiot, Sora....  
  
Ansem: *glares at Kiki* NO MATTER! I HAVE SOME MUNNY!! *takes out round gold things from Wakkas ear*  
  
Wakka: 0.0 how did I get here?! *runs back to bathroom*  
  
Everyone: o.0;;  
  
Ansem: anyways...lets go!!! *both are about to step out of the door, when suddenly Ansem turns around to everyone* MY EVIL PLAN IS WORKING! I HAVE BECOME A MARY SUE! AND SOON, ALL THE BOYS OF THE WORLD WILL BOW DOWN TO MEEEEEEEE!!!! MUHAHAHAHAHA--*chokes on random emu* *cough cough* HA!!!!  
  
Everyone: o.0 o...k....  
  
Kairi: *not paying attention to anything whatsoever* gah...I hate this channel...*switches it to Powerpuff girls* OO! yay! Go Blossom!  
  
Blossom on TV: We are heroins, and we need to get a good nights sleep so that we can be ready for fighting villians in the morning!  
  
Kairi: Heroins...? They're on drugs....?  
  
Everyone: x.x;;  
  
Kairi: SO THATS HOW THEY FLY!!!  
  
Bubbles: *suddenly pops out of TV and starts to cry* NO WE'RE NOT!!!  
  
Kiki: *slaps forehead again* grrr...  
  
Kiki's mom: Anyone want some sushi? *comes in holding plate full of sushi with little colorful toothpicks going through the middle*  
  
Everyone except Kairi(shes trying to calm down Bubbles): I DO!   
  
Ansem: *regular voice while munching on sushi* yum...*munch munch* where did you get this Mrs. Kiki's mom?  
  
Kiki's mom: from Japan! duh, silly!....hey...is that my bra you're wearing...? o.0  
  
Ansem: uhh...no...?  
  
Random echo: yes it is! it is! it is! it is!  
  
Kiki's mom: 0.0 *tackles Ansem*   
  
football players: woo! dog pile! *hop ontop of the Kiki's mom and Ansem*  
  
FFX girls: *trying to build a human pyramid* *Rikku on bottom and Lulu on the top*  
  
Lulu: and woo!! Lets go team!  
  
Rikku: AHHHHHHH!!!! HAHAHAHA!!! THE WORM....IS TICKLING ME!!!! AHHHHHAAAAA!!!  
  
Worm: *evil snicker and continues to tickle*  
  
*pyramid falls*  
  
*curtain closes*  
  
random voice from the behind the curtain that sounds like Riku's: WHERE'D ALL THESE GIRLS COME FROM?  
  
Kiki: *tries to open the curtain back up* EVIL CURTAIN! NO! WAIT READERS! THE CHAPTERS NOT OVER YET!!!  
  
Readers: awwwwww darnit...  
  
Kiki: x.x I was just joking....  
  
Readers: *begin to party* W00T!! *blows on kazoos and throws confetti...o.0*  
  
Kiki: X.X *dies*  
  
Kairi: AHHH!! NOW BOTH DISCLAIMERS ARE DEAD!!!  
  
*curtain closes on Kiki's head*  
  
supposed to be dead Kiki: OW!!!  
  
Everyone: THOSE DARN CURTAINS! 


	4. Lotsa Fanmail

A/N: I like piiiiiiiiiiiiie ^_^;;   
  
Readers: Well...whats the note?!  
  
Kiki: That WAS the note! ^_^  
  
Everyone: X.X;;  
  
Disclaimer: I do not ow--  
  
Sora: wait...WHO'S THE DISCLAIMER?!   
  
Muzzy: I thought they both died in the last chapter...o.0;;  
  
Riku: *I* WILL BE THE DISCLAIMER, SINCE EVERYONE LOVES ME!  
  
mob of pink dressed fan girls: OH, YES, EVERYONE DOES! *turns to the rest of the people in the chapter* they BETTER! *holds up badgers to their necks*  
  
Kairi: EEEEEE!!!! I SURRENDER!  
  
Everyone: o.o;;  
  
Kiki: -.-;; *slaps forehead* ai ai ai...  
  
Cloud: *pops out of rubber duckie that was in Oprahs tub* ;-; YOU STOLE MEH LINE, YAH LINE STEALER!!!  
  
Kiki: HEY! I DECIDE WHO STEAL THE LINES AROUND HERE! I AM THE ALL-POWERFUL ONE!  
  
Yuna: o.0;; like, I thought you were my hamburger...  
  
Kiki: o.0;; noooooo, I'm not your hamburger...  
  
Riku: ;-; I'M THE DISCLAIMER, BUT I HAVE YET TO....DISCLAIM!  
  
mob of pink dressed fan girls: DO NOT FRET! WEEEE SHALL MAKE SURE EVERYONE IS QUIET!!! *holds up badgers to everyone again* there...*evil grin while staring at Riku* :]  
  
Riku: ^_^ thank you mob of pink dressed fan girls! Now...I do not own Kingdom Hearts!  
  
Lulu: well, DUH! like, your IN Kingdom Hearts!  
  
Riku: MOB OF PINK DRESSED FAN GIRLS, ATTTAAAAAACK!!!!  
  
mob of pink dressed fan girls: *foam at the mouth and tackle Lulu*  
  
Kiki: x.x;; lets just get on with the story....  
  
Chapter- This chapter is dedicated to Riku and all of his fan mail.  
  
Riku: ^_________^ I'm a STAR!!!!! *begins to float upwards into little stars*  
  
Everyone: o.0;;  
  
Kiki: -.-;; anyways....  
  
Riku: *opens letter* ooOOOooo...This one is from The evil fan girl from the moon!  
  
Everyone: o.0;; really? *reads letter*  
  
Like, Dear Riku!  
  
Your TOTALLY TOTALLY TOTALLY TOTALLY TOTALLY HOOOOOOOTT *sizzle* please write back the time of the marraige! ^_^  
  
  
  
-The evil fan girl from the moon  
  
Everyone: o.0;; lets see the next one...  
  
Riku: ^_^ okey dokey! *opens next one* Hmm...this one is from...Muzzy o.0;;...;-; too bad I can't read Spanish...  
  
Kairi: ^_^ thats okay, *points to bottom of the letter* There are subtitles!  
  
Kiki: o.0;; on a letter...?  
  
Kairi: *nod nod*  
  
Riku: *reads the subtitles*   
  
My Dearest Riku,   
  
You are hott  
  
-Muzzy  
  
Muzzy: ^________^;; *hiding pen behind back*  
  
Riku: o.0;; ooooo...kaaaaaaay....on to the next one! *opens next closest letter* pfft! They spelled my name wrong!  
  
Sora: o.0;; they did...? lemme see that....*reads*  
  
Dear, sweet, hyperactive Rikku,  
  
I think your cute and I wanna marry you.  
  
  
  
-Maester Seymour  
  
Rikku: ^_^ Yay!!! *goes up and hugglez Seymour*  
  
Yuna: *runs off crying*  
  
Seymour: ^___^;; er...eheheh???  
  
Riku: *long pause*...and onto the next one! *pulls a letter out of Wakka's ear*  
  
Wakka: 0.0 *runs back up to the bathroom*  
  
Riku: *reading* why, its from Dr. Phil o.0  
  
Dear Riku,  
  
I really think that you should come on my show sometime. I promise it would be a changing day in your life! We could talk about Maleficent, those heartless, and that darkness thing.   
  
-Dr. Phil  
  
Everyone: o.0;;  
  
Tidus: *twitch* ...squeak SQUUUUEAAAAAAAAAKKKKK!!!!!! *runs off to find more nuts*  
  
Yuffie: ...*runs after him*  
  
Riku: o.0;; next letter...*an evil munchkin hands him a letter* Er...Sora...?   
  
Sora: yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah?  
  
Riku: This ones from your mother o.0  
  
Sora: so THAAAAAAATS why she went off to divorce court last week! ^____^ I understand everything now!  
  
Kiki: ...what is the purpose of meaning?  
  
Sora: o.0;; What are you talking about? I don't understand what your saying!  
  
Kiki: -.-;; my point exactly.  
  
Riku: o.0;; anyways....*reads*  
  
Dear Riku,  
  
I just wanted to say that I want to maaaaaaarry you, and kiiiiiiiiiiiiss you, and huuuuuuuuuuuug you....and maaaaaaarry you!   
  
-[CENSORED] a.k.a.: Sora's mom  
  
P.S.: you left your underpants at our house when you slept over, hun. You can come and pick it up whenever. I was nice enough to even wash 'em for you! ^_^ tootaloo!  
  
Riku: er..*blush and crumples up the letter* ^___^;;;;;; next one! *reads*....0.0;; um, ya'll don't need to read this one...*throws it behind them all, but it hits Ansem on the head*  
  
Ansem: *girly scream* OUCH! *picks up letters* whats this? *reads* :] *snicker snicker* *holds it up infront of everyone*  
  
Riku: NUUUUUU!!!!  
  
Dear pumpkin poo, hunny pie (Riku),  
  
I just wanted to make sure you weren't going to be late for dinner again! And also, Sora's mother called, and I want you to go and pick up your underwear right away young man! You better not forget your undies again the next time you sleep over! Oh, and DON'T THINK I DIDN'T FIND THOSE NICK JR. MAGAZINES UNDERNEATH YOUR MATTRESS! I'M VERY ASHAMED OF YOU RIKU! A boy your age should be looking at Playboy! ^_^   
  
-Your loving mother  
  
Everyone: *snicker snicker*  
  
Riku: ;-; thats it...thats enough reading fan mail for today!  
  
Munchkin #34: *snicker* yeah...*giggle* cause you have to go pick up your underwear right away!   
  
Everyone but the mob of pink fan girls: *burst out laughing* BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!  
  
mob of pink dressed fan girls: GRRRRR!!!!!! *foams at mouth and forms a barrier around Riku* NO ONE PICKS ON RIKU LIKE THAT!!! *let loose all the badgers*  
  
And the chaos will continue in the next chapter .;;  
  
Kiki: x.x;; that chapter really sucked....it was short and wasn't as funny...but, I hope ya'll still like it! ^_^ Please Review! 


	5. I Hate Football

A/N: Thank you for the reviews! I feel so special. And, as I have promised in the last chapter, the chaos will continue! ^____^   
  
Riku: *tap taps Kiki on the shoulder* ;-; I don't want to be the disclaimer anymore...  
  
Kiki: o.0;; why?  
  
Riku: *shifty eyes and lowers his voice* didn't yah notice...*suddenly screams* THEY ALL DIE!!!!!!!!   
  
Kiki: o.0;; wow....your right...Lets give the job to Kairi! ^_____^  
  
Kairi: *looks up from a 4 peice puzzle that was spread on the floor* Pudding?  
  
Kiki: :] hey Kairi, if you be the disclaimer...I'll give you....PUDDING!!!! *evil snicker*  
  
Kairi: PUDDING?!  
  
Kiki: *nod nod*  
  
Kairi: OKEY POKEY DOKEY! La la la...*steps on stage* The author does no--EE! *gets shot by an assassin*  
  
Kiki: YES! SCORE!  
  
Everyone: 0.0;;;;;  
  
Kiki: o.0;; I mean...the poor sucker...anyways...I don't own Kingdom Hearts...-.-;;...*mumbles* for the millionth time...*is suddenly psychotic* MUHAHAHAHA!!!! DO YAH HEAR THAT LAWYERS?! I DON'T OWN KINGDOM HEARTS!!!! *slaps butt in their faces* NYAH NYAH NYAH NYAH NYAH NYAH! ;p!!!!! I DON'T OWN KINGODM HEARTS! I DON'T OWN KINGDOM HEARTS! MUHAHAHAHA!! NEED ME TO SAY IT AGAIN, YAH IDIOTS?! I'LL SAY IT SLOWLY FOR YOU! I...DO...NOT...OWN...KIN--*gets shot in the butt with a paralysis dart*  
  
The nice men with the white jackets and the padded trucks: *carries the unconscious Kiki away into truck by the legs*  
  
Kairi: o.0 that was strange...  
  
Everyone: 0.0 Kairi, your dead, aren't you?!   
  
Kairi: o.0;; OOHH!! YEAH, I WAS SHOT, WASN'T I? *suddenly falls to the floor dead*  
  
Everyone: *just stands there, making sure she wouldn't move again before they did something else*   
  
Ansem:....Okay....how about we go on to the story?  
  
Everyone: *slow nod nod*  
  
Ansem: ...hmm..okay!  
  
Everyone in unison: Now, onto the story! *biiiiiiiig smile as they tap dance off the stage and the curtains open*  
  
Chapter- I would like to thank Chibi Neko-chan for the idea for this chapter ^__^ The cast all went to a football game!  
  
FFX girls: *standing up in the front row of the bleachers in cheerleading outfits* LETS GO TEAM! *does cartwheels and flips...unfortunately right off the bleachers*  
  
CRUUUUUUUUUUUNCH!  
  
Everyone: eeeeeeewwww....  
  
Rikku: ....ehhh....I see the bright light....what is that...? *vision clears, and she sees the sun right above her* AHHHH!! IT BURNS MY CUTE LITTLE EYES!!!!  
  
Sun: ;-; I'm hurt! Well, at least I don't Moon you!  
  
*bum dum CHOO!*  
  
Kiki: o.0;; when did we get drums...?  
  
Person behind them all: WOOOO!!!!! YAH!! *suddenly stands up and spills his popcorn and soda on everyone accidently*  
  
Kiki: *hair soaked with soda and butter* -.- I HATE football games...if the FFX girls weren't cheerleaders...I wouldn't even BE here...*grumbles*  
  
Kairi that somehow revived: *licks face of soda and popcorn like scooby doo* hmmm...I wanna get something to eat! ^_^  
  
The worm: IIIIIIIIII'll walk you to the consession stand! ^______^ *sweet non-exsistent smile*  
  
Kairi: ^____^ OKEY POKEY DOKEY!  
  
random echo from nothingness: DOKEY! DOKEY! dokey! dokey! *fades away*   
  
Kiki: o.0;;  
  
Kairi: *walks off to the consession stand with the worm*  
  
Worm: *suddenly turns around* MUHAHAHAHA!!! MY EVIL PLAN IS WORKING!!!!!!!! I WILL VISIT EVERY CONSESSION STAND IN THE WORLD AT LEAST 5 TIMES, SO THAT THE WORKERS WILL GET SO ANNOYED, THEY'LL GIVE ME THE WORLD JUST SO I'D STOP!!!!! MUHAHAHA!!!! *goes back to walking with Kairi to the consession stand*  
  
Ansem: ;-; YOU STOLE MY PLAN! *runs off crying*   
  
Kiki: Yes! Three down, umm....a lot more to go...o.0;;  
  
Some random really fat person: *sits down next to Kiki*   
  
Kiki: -.-;; great....just great...  
  
The random really fat person: *FAAAAAAAART! burp belch! PASS GAS!!!!*  
  
Kiki: *holding nose* *in nasily voice* I wish that the worm and Kairi were back....  
  
Luckily, the worm and Kairi just happen to show up.....and with literally tons of food.  
  
Kairi: ^_____^ I think that I got just enough food to hold me out for the game!  
  
Worm: *panting heavily while carrying over 345,464 times its weight* :[ maybe my plan won't work after all...  
  
Sora: oooOOOoooo...Kairi, can I have some pudding?  
  
Kairi: *foams at the mouth and barks at Sora* BARK WOOF! Translation: BARK WOOF!  
  
Sora: o.0;;  
  
Kairi: *stops foaming at the mouth, and tries to sit down* Umm....incredibly fat person....your in my seat...  
  
the random really fat person: *in really high squeaky voice* oh, sorry Miss! *moves*  
  
Kairi: ^_^ Thankyou! *sits down, and worm sits next to her*  
  
Riku: o.0;; don't you think you have enough food there, I'M HOTT! *now he has spasms in every sentence....just to let you know*  
  
Kairi: *shakes head* ^___^ nope! *begins to much happily on a pickle*  
  
Riku: o.0;; *goes back to watching the game*  
  
Kairi: *sniff sniff* hmmm...*sniff* ....*turns to Riku and shows him whats up her nose* DO I HAVE A BAT IN DA CAVE?!  
  
Riku: 0.0 *inches away slowly, but bumps in Kiki* oh...I-I'm s-sorry, I'M HOTT, there, Kiki! I didn't mean to, I'm hott, bump into you there...  
  
Kiki: o.0;; no, its okay....  
  
Riku: I'M HOTT, good...^_____^;;  
  
Kiki: You know...with those spasms you should really see a doctor...whats next, seizures?  
  
random pink dressed Riku fan: EEE!!! LOOK! THERES RIKU!!! *begins to have a seizure*  
  
Riku: hmm...your, I'M HOTT, right...people are beginning to have seizures when the see me!  
  
Kiki: x.x thats not really what I meant...but...okay...whatever...  
  
A thunder clap is heard, and it starts to pour. Everyone gets out they're umbrella's. That is...everyone but Kiki.  
  
Kiki: -.-;; juuuuuuuuust peachy...another reason to hate football...  
  
Kairi: *hands Kiki a peach* ^_____^ there you go! Now its even MORE peachy!!!!   
  
Kiki: .;; babbling idiot...  
  
Kairi: *also hands her a babbling idiot, a.k.a. Goofy* ^_______^  
  
Kiki: x.X;;   
  
Goofy: HYUCK HYUCK! *sits on her lap* yer puuuuuurty *mindless drool*   
  
Kiki: eheheheh...HOW ABOUT WE END THE CHAPTER NOW?! ^___________^;;; *twitch twitch*  
  
Readers: *gets down on knees and begs*  
  
Okay then...the chapters over! *flips the 'applause' button on, and clapping is heard as the curtains falls down*   
  
Kiki: *from behind the curtains* Wait a minute...we have an applause machine? x.X no one ever tells me these things!!!  
  
After this chapter, I might not be updating a lot, sorry ^_____^;; *covers head from rotting produce* 


End file.
